


A Toast

by DavidOfBreath



Category: Borderlands (Video Games)
Genre: Drinking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-15
Updated: 2020-07-15
Packaged: 2021-03-04 21:42:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,119
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25273366
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DavidOfBreath/pseuds/DavidOfBreath
Summary: Our latest vault hunters take a break and a quick drink together.
Comments: 1
Kudos: 21





	A Toast

"I really still don't get you. Ultraviolet and Fish Slap named you yellowcake, but you don't like eating yellow cake uranium or actual yellow cake," Moze said to the launcher as she cleaned up the barrel of it. "Oh well. So long as you don't bite my fingers off while I do maintenance and you keep mowing COV down, you're still a good eridian tech launcher in my book. I don't care what they say about the Backburner."

"Talkin' with yer gun? I thought it was just yer tank ya talked with."

Moze looked up at the doorway of her room, seeing Zane standing there, leaning against it. "Coming from the guy that chit-chats with his own digiclone. Pretty sure most people just look in a mirror to do that, or go to the quick change station. What's up?"

"Jus' wanted to come check in on ya." Zane plopped down on the bench next to her table, "Ah, coincidentally, claptrap set a new 'friend' loose in my room, so Tannis an' Ellie are currently chewin' him out for it while gettin' it fixed up and I'm wanderin' around 'til that's all finished."

"You would think the threats after Kevin would've kept that from happening." She set her gun down and stood up, heading over to the table and sitting down. "What was it that made him think this would be a whole new case?"

"That would be djira."

"Djira? You mean those little acidic suicide-bombers?"

"The same," Zane took a drink from the bottle he was carrying, "And the five of him he let in did that business over every inch of my room."

"Gross. Well, no bodies to shove into the airlock, so I guess he managed to dodge Tannis' airlock threat."

"Ain't stoppin' the two of 'em from wantin' to shove him in anyway."

Another voice came from the doorway. "What's all the commotion about?"

The two turned to see Amara standing there, with Fl4k walking up as well.

Zane waved while motioning for them to come in. "Talkin' about Claptrap destroyin' my room."

Fl4k sat next to Zane on the bench. "Is this related to the stench that my pets have been complaining of?"

"Aye, that it is."

"And so did you select Moze's room for your retreat for the overpowering smell of oil and other fluids related to mechanical maintenance?"

Amara chuckled as she sat at the table as well. "Each of your rooms has some kind of strong stench, whether it be booze, pets, or oil."

Zane set a bottle down on the table along with four glasses, filling them as a chuckle escaped him, "Comin' from the one of us with a room that smells like a gym?"

Moze picked up her glass and took a quick drink. "Hey, it's not a bad smell."

"Oh? You sayin' ya like the workout smell?"

Moze spit her drink. "ACK! That's not-! I mean it's not as strong as the smell of our rooms!"

Fl4k called out one of his rakks who started licking at his drink glass. "She is correct. I have numerous times listened to crew members conversing about the three of our rooms. I believe it is both respect and righteous fear of our deeds which keep complaints from rising."

Zane downed his glass. "Sounds like their problem to me. I mean, we've killed the Calypsos, destroyed a giant super Maliwan bot, nabbed multiple vaults,"

Amara sniffed her drink before taking a sip from it, "stopped a secret army of Handsome Jack's along with a secret super robot with his visage, killed an ancient vault monster and the people leeching from its power,"

Moze wiped her mouth with her arm before taking another drink, "And stopped some old corporate super monster now. Oh, did we ever figure out which company was responsible for Gehenna?"

"No, we did not." Fl4k scratched the head of his rakk. "I spoke with Marcus of it and payed for him to search for information, but nothing turned up. The company responsible seems to have efficiently wiped all records of it."

Zane poured himself another glass "Curious were ya Flak? Wanted to get the scoop on that juicy genetic tech for yer beasties?"

"Yes, I'm quite curious of the additional bloodshed which could be achieved from it. If I were to guess though, I would assume the company to either be DAHL or potentially Jakobs from Montgomery's time. I plan on talking with Wainwright on it once the married couple have settled down, though I'm doubtful he would have the records, if they exist at all."

Moze refilled her glass, "Could've been Atlus. Buuut if that were the case then files are definitely gone."

"Indeed, which is why I have ruled them out of my investigation. There is no sense in hunting for information from a company with so few surviving records or members, given that everyone under Rhys are not old Atlus employees."

"Oh! Speakin' of pet stuff, Moze were ya serious about trainin' a cat like ya told slim back on Gehenna?"

Moze shook her head slowly. "Yeah. I turned that adorable fluffy baby into a killing monster. Probably still racking up kills for Vladof, too."

Fl4k tilted his head. "We will have to compare pet training methods at some point."

Moze downed her glass. "Suppose so. I could probably teach Jabber to use heavy guns, but it'd really slow him down."

"Interesting. I will have to consider having him use the Backburner or Jericho then."

The others stopped mid-drink and shared frightened glances.

Moze cleared her throat after a moment. "We'd, uh, have to start at assault rifles obviously, then move on to shotguns when his aim with the assault rifles are dead-center, then uh, we'd see where it goes from there."

Zane thought back to the first time Moze shot a Jericho in their direction to clear a group of COV surrounding them, and the similar situation when she picked up a backburner, finding out the hard way that both weapons hurt allies, with moze quickly running between them to pick them back up.

"That would be satisfactory. A shotgun would also be a handy tool to increase the efficiency of slaughter." Fl4k lifted his glass, "A toast would be customary for a gathering of this nature, I believe."

Amara lifted her glass, shaking her head. "And what exactly are we toasting to?"

Zane set down his glass and got out his bottle, holding it up. "Well, it ain't our health, that's for sure. Fortune? Fame? Shotgun-wielding monkeys?"

Moze refilled her glass and thought for a second before holding it up. "Eh, let's keep it simple. A toast, to having comrades to toast with."

Clink.

**Author's Note:**

> Author's Note: Been suffering from some heavy writer's block over the past few weeks, so I figured I decided to write this quick one-shot fic just to keep my writer brain going. Hope you enjoyed some Borderlands character banter!


End file.
